It's easier to run

On thursday, march 12, after 5 weeks together, me and cody broke up. You wanna know why? Because and i quote " I am too ubermature". Yeah,... i found out by my roommate's phone cause he was texting her about me and his relationship and how he need to find out how to break up with me. And not only that he was trying to get with her. :( how fucked up is that? And after dealing with all the pain,.. we had a chance to make it into the finals but the stupid team lied infront of our faces breaking a promise on live telivision.

I repeat.. this week has been fucked up

What do you think?

"1.) An inexplainable yet incredibly strong feeling for someone...Most people use the word "love" to get into someone else's pants. Love is overused in today's world, people say they love someone because of the way they look or their body. That isn't love. Love is when you can't do anything without thinking about that person, you always want to be with them. It's not that you want to have sex with them, you just want to spend time with them and you just want to hold them and never let go. Love can be fooling, you can think you're in love and it can lead to the most horrible feeling in the world. Also you can wait so long for someone, loving them, and waiting for them to love you back, but they don't return it for a long time and you spend years thinking and thinking and it tears you up inside but when that person realizes that they love you back it's miraculous. Love is a very strong word, don't overuse it."
I found this quote somewhere over the rainbow and it really stood out at me.
Why you ask?
Well, think about it. Who do you love that isn't related to you ( and be honest ^^) ? What is love? Personally, I believe love as a mental emotional that evolves over time. It is something that happens in the mind and works its way into your nervous system.
But I am being hypocritcal. The time it takes to evolves is a variable. I mean, what if that whole mental time can take two days? Two weeks? We of course have read it in Twilight. And read the miraculousy transition...
Onto other things.. i want any open debate about a certain topic. I was just curious and want to know what you think.

Sex. The drive of the physical world today. If you loved someone and thought you were "ready", would you give that person all you had? Would you rather have sex after marriage? Do you think society is pressuring teenagers?

I would love to hear what you guys have to say to this. And as a disclaimer " NO THIS ISN'T RELATED TO MY LIFE."

My favorite Youtube video

He is my strength

I don't know if you remember this, but do you remember when i got grounded on the last week of school last year? Do you remember the reason? If not, well i got grounded because I was taking some of my dad's happy pills. I was using them to clear my head. It is just at times when i was thinking to much to almost pain. I couldn't stop it.
Well, because of the issues with Cody and Sara i had a need to stop my head from hurting. I tried everything. Coffee, sugar, even linkin Park. But it got so bad that i felt a need. A want. A desire.
I didn't take it.
I talked to kate about it. She is the one who understand the filter i needed for my head. And she helped calm me down. While i was in the process of calling her Cody came outside to see what i was up to. Earlier in the day, i have been giving him space. He had a lot on his mind.
He wanted to know what was up with me. I couldn't tell him. Well, he knows about the thing since he read my story "Could you do it?". I just couldn't tell him in the face cause then i would start crying and i hate it when people see me cry. I don't want people to see me as weak.
Later that day, he text me about what happen. And i told him that i am stopping myself because of him.
He is my strength. I don't want to hurt him. That is the last thing i ever want to do.

Cody is my strength.

yummy

here you go nina, I had to fight lani to get this video.

Leave a post

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Just a preview

Since you guys want to know what he looks like. And i am posting some vids later

My Cookie

this is my cookie! If you know what i mean :)

... :)

Well, i finally allowed "someone" to view my blog. Well, not this one yet, the other one. I have to say, this blog has been a diary for me for the past year. And i want to thank each an everyone of you who posted and contribute to Road Writer. I feel so proud. Sophmore thoughts and giggles has been going on for three years now.

wow

okay, and the wait is over:
my day started off okay. I was trying my "let the pieces fall" and don't worry about anything. then after school i came into the classroom all happy because i really did feel happy. (we had a early out day.) So as i was walking in Jessica and Lani decide to be real funny.
jess: Looks like someone is happy.
Me: Yup i am
Lani: I bet she did something
Me: no i am just happy (seriously i didn't do anything)
Jess: Oh know, don't worry, we know.
Lani: oh yeah
Me: I did nothing!
Jess: Uh huh sure. WE know you did.
Me: I but i really did nothing!!! I am happy cause i am happy.
Jess: We know you don't have to lie. Even cody knows.
Me: what??? (cody heard his name being called)
COdy: what? i hear my name/
Lani: See even cody knows
Me: I did nothing!!
Cody: What did you do/
Lani: Risa Got "Lucky" ( at that point i knew i was going to kill them)
Cody: With who?
Me: Nobody!!
Lani: Yes you did. YOU got lucky imagitively. You know what i mean
Me: ( i know finally got what they were saying. It meant that i was daydreaming about cody in some way...) oh! Well... now that you said that. Yes i have.
Cody: With who?
Me : no one
Jess: it is the person that she likes
Cody: which is who??
Me: Someone.
Cody: Who?
Me: someone.

Then we had to get to work so he couldn't ask again. But then, 30 minutes later....

Cody:Pisst marisa... come here
me: what??
He wrote on word three questions:
1. you like someone (yes)
2. is it someone is robotics?? ( yes)
3. is it me...? ( this wasn't the fully question cause he deleted it before i could read all of it.
then he asked me again who i like over and over and all i told him was that i couldn't tell him. ( sad i know *tear)
So then he had to leave to go to a doctor app.
Then Jessica had to ask me a question. Apparentlly, she gave cody my number so he could text me. (the traitor!!!) and so he sent me a text saying:
"about the third question, i aske dif you like me cause i migh feel the same , hypothetically"
so i text back with a big smile on my face
"Hypothetically?"
"I just used that so i didn't get put down if i was wrong and it wasn't me. But yes i do like you, ur beautiful, i love how i can be loud and sily and you don't seem to mind"
then i respond that i like him too
Wow!!
Another text of his was:
"thank you that so ice same with me. your beautiful and nice and have a great personalitly. id love to spend a whote day next to you which can do whenever you want."
Is it me your does he sound a but like matt?? Huh? ANNA!
And i as a bonus treat, here is our chat log:

19:57] mizuderstoodgirl: olha[19:57] ellisc7458: hey baby[19:57] mizuderstoodgirl: :) that is early.. [19:57] mizuderstoodgirl: 2 1/ hours![19:58] ellisc7458: i know lol but i go to tutorin lol and chill [19:58] mizuderstoodgirl: wow[19:59] ellisc7458: ya i know lol im lookin forward to first we never have to leave each others side[19:59] mizuderstoodgirl: except for when we get to the hotel[20:00] ellisc7458: no we can chill there to right untill midnight [20:00] mizuderstoodgirl: fine with me then.. i don' need to sleep... just lots coffee :) it is going to be dffernt going to a different regiona;[20:01] mizuderstoodgirl: all i would see is white people.. tall white people...[20:01] ellisc7458: all because they think we gonna do the do or somthin lol ya same here we always go to huston but we should be able to win theres only 3 other vetran teams lol[20:02] ellisc7458: lmao where exactly did you use to live i forget all i remember is your school site filtered as porn lmao[20:02] mizuderstoodgirl: i hope we win..[20:02] mizuderstoodgirl: ... -_-[20:02] mizuderstoodgirl: hawaii[20:03] mizuderstoodgirl: when i first got off the plain in Dallas the first thing that came out of my mouth is "So many white people!!!! I am blind"[20:03] mizuderstoodgirl: the only really white person i knowit hawaii in my big brother TOM[20:03] ellisc7458: me 2 then we can spend another long time together on the way to nationals lmao haha not like that at school tho lol[20:03] ellisc7458: lol\[20:04] mizuderstoodgirl: yeah.. i feel racist[20:04] mizuderstoodgirl: loi[20:04] ellisc7458: lol how so u go with me im white and native american lol[20:04] ellisc7458: mostly white tho only 1/8 native american'[20:05] mizuderstoodgirl: ..... i am not against white people.. i am half white. it is just the comment seemed racist. :)[20:05] mizuderstoodgirl: native american?[20:05] mizuderstoodgirl: really?[20:05] mizuderstoodgirl: cool.[20:05] ellisc7458: lmao [20:05] ellisc7458: ya [20:06] ellisc7458: cheroke blackfoot[20:06] mizuderstoodgirl: .... i know cheroke but blackfoot is where you lost me.[20:07] ellisc7458: lmao its a branch from chr\erokee nation originated when trail of tears came about and they branched off to oklahoma [20:07] mizuderstoodgirl: i bet your homestate is oklahoma....? :)[20:07] mizuderstoodgirl: i used to live at fort sill[20:08] ellisc7458: yes it is =] go back there all the time to visit my sister and neice and rest of family lol[20:08] ellisc7458: born and raised till 4th grade in norman[20:08] ellisc7458: i brb got 2 brush my teeth and crap lol[20:09] mizuderstoodgirl: loi[20:09] mizuderstoodgirl: k[20:09] ellisc7458: not literally crap lmao just other stuff that sounded weird lol[20:09] mizuderstoodgirl: LOI[20:09] ellisc7458: haha\[20:09] mizuderstoodgirl: k[20:12] ellisc7458: back lol[20:12] ellisc7458: wats loi btw ?[20:13] mizuderstoodgirl: Laughing on the inside[20:13] ellisc7458: oh lol i feel dumb now [20:13] mizuderstoodgirl: cause really, you can't laugh outloud while typing...[20:13] ellisc7458: nice[20:13] mizuderstoodgirl: yeah.. that sentence didn't come out right[20:14] ellisc7458: haha[20:14] mizuderstoodgirl: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-5Ilq3kFxek[20:15] ellisc7458: FAIL[20:15] mizuderstoodgirl: i laugh everytime.. oh the pain..!![20:16] ellisc7458: i would totally love to give you a massage right now or anytime you want[20:17] ellisc7458: apperantly im frickin amazing[20:17] mizuderstoodgirl: well.. my neck still hurts.... :)[20:17] ellisc7458: what happened baby?[20:18] ellisc7458: and ill help you out with that in the morning for as long as you want[20:18] mizuderstoodgirl: I think i have been slepping wrong. and i will take that offer.[20:19] ellisc7458: lol downloading stepbrothers borat accepted and pinapple express right now lol[20:19] ellisc7458: ^.^ and i will happily ablige [20:19] ellisc7458: (idk how to spell it lol)][20:19] mizuderstoodgirl: acepted is a gay movie[20:20] ellisc7458: true but i love the stupid parts[20:20] mizuderstoodgirl: ... got a point there. [20:20] ellisc7458: but i like the stupid movies lol[20:21] ellisc7458: and the movies where you dont watch them lmao hahaha[20:22] mizuderstoodgirl: loi.. [20:22] mizuderstoodgirl: my favorite is juo[20:22] mizuderstoodgirl: juno*[20:22] ellisc7458: lol never actually saw that ill have to download it do you lik those kind of movies to?[20:23] mizuderstoodgirl: i like only feww chick flicks like 300 and the notebook[20:24] mizuderstoodgirl: but i mostly like comedies[20:24] ellisc7458: same here and every once in a while some action [20:24] ellisc7458: you know what movies i was talkin bout right?[20:24] mizuderstoodgirl: nope[20:25] ellisc7458: where you dont actually watch the movie lol[20:25] mizuderstoodgirl: oh.. for example 300?[20:25] mizuderstoodgirl: or no..?[20:25] ellisc7458: was up with 300?[20:26] mizuderstoodgirl: well... :)[20:26] mizuderstoodgirl: 300 is a girl movie not a guy movie[20:26] mizuderstoodgirl: and every girls didn't watch the movie , they watch the guys[20:27] ellisc7458: what i mean is a movie you go see but dont actually watch the movie instead you have "fun" [20:28] mizuderstoodgirl: oh that... nah..[20:28] ellisc7458: lol why not ?[20:29] mizuderstoodgirl: never had a reason too[20:31] ellisc7458: oh lol i honestly dont like it to much not a good setting much rather be out by the lake with the stars out and share a kiss thats romantic unrather like at the movies which you never remeber[20:32] mizuderstoodgirl: true...[20:33] mizuderstoodgirl: very true[20:33] mizuderstoodgirl: :)[20:34] mizuderstoodgirl: wow...[20:34] ellisc7458: i like special moments to cherish with that 1 person you really care about as i do for you[20:34] ellisc7458: hope 1 day we shall share a moment such as that[20:35] mizuderstoodgirl: :-*[20:35] mizuderstoodgirl: i hope so too[20:35] mizuderstoodgirl: dude..[20:35] ellisc7458: ?[20:35] ellisc7458: yes babe\[20:35] mizuderstoodgirl: either you secretly gay.. or you are those few species of guys that actually aren't ass[20:36] mizuderstoodgirl: that was just too sweet and too cute..[20:36] mizuderstoodgirl: wow[20:36] ellisc7458: definitly not the first 1[20:36] mizuderstoodgirl: thank god[20:36] ellisc7458: but ya thats actually the reason girls dont like me[20:36] mizuderstoodgirl: ....WHAT??[20:37] ellisc7458: for some reason they see me in a brotherly manner [20:37] ellisc7458: prolly cuz they dont take relationships seriously[20:37] mizuderstoodgirl: i don't see that... i see my bf[20:38] ellisc7458: thank you baby you make me whole im lucky to have u[20:38] mizuderstoodgirl: i'm the lucky one[20:39] ellisc7458: no way i am ur amazing i couldnt ask for anything more in a girl[20:39] mizuderstoodgirl: thank you...[20:40] mizuderstoodgirl: man i want tomorrow to come faster[20:40] ellisc7458: me 2 i want to see you and be with you[20:40] mizuderstoodgirl: same with me...[20:41] mizuderstoodgirl: brb.. i am going to get a cookie[20:41] ellisc7458: yum get me 1 2 plz =)[20:42] mizuderstoodgirl: what kind?[20:42] ellisc7458: i cont care anything yu like im sure is good[20:43] ellisc7458: dont*[20:43] mizuderstoodgirl: okay.. her is your chocolate chip mac cookie.. (throws cookie through screen)[20:43] mizuderstoodgirl: here*[20:43] ellisc7458: thankyou[20:43] ellisc7458: its yummy[20:43] mizuderstoodgirl: no prob[20:43] mizuderstoodgirl: loi[20:44] ellisc7458: (jumps through screen and gives a kiss)[20:44] mizuderstoodgirl: (kisses you back)[20:45] ellisc7458: grr i actually want school to hurry up lol never thought id say that[20:45] mizuderstoodgirl: loi... for the past few weeks i crave for school and robotics for you[20:46] ellisc7458: like i wish it could be like from a movie where i have a convertable and were on a cliff above a lake and the stars were out and we just shared a romantic evning[20:46] ellisc7458: thankyou so much you make me feel so special you to amazing[20:48] mizuderstoodgirl: a red convertable looking over hanamou bay.. with a nice sunset eating panda express.. hmn you make me feel special. [20:49] mizuderstoodgirl: then walk on the beach..[20:49] ellisc7458: that be so amazing i wish i had the chance to go to hawaii then we would so do that[20:51] mizuderstoodgirl: yeah... walk down kalakaoa avenue then head up the diamond head. Man,... we need to go the the hawaii regional next year..[20:52] ellisc7458: that be awsome i wish we could but i dont belleive that would happen unless we can find some amazing sponsers[20:52] mizuderstoodgirl: or get rid of mrs. melendaz..[20:52] ellisc7458: yes we have to do that[20:52] mizuderstoodgirl: if we didn't have expensive uniforms we could probably afford it[20:52] ellisc7458: yep[20:52] ellisc7458: but shes stupid[20:53] mizuderstoodgirl: beyond[20:53] mizuderstoodgirl: the spawn of satan[20:53] ellisc7458: ok lol lets not ruin this amazing night even if that is hilarious[20:54] mizuderstoodgirl: fine... (puts away torchering devices..)[20:54] ellisc7458: lmao[20:54] ellisc7458: what kind are there[20:54] mizuderstoodgirl: well...[20:54] mizuderstoodgirl: i was thinking a taser..[20:55] mizuderstoodgirl: posion dounut[20:55] mizuderstoodgirl: but that is just off the top of my head.. :)[20:56] mizuderstoodgirl: anyways.. enough about her...[20:56] ellisc7458: yes lets get back to u [20:56] mizuderstoodgirl: why me[20:56] mizuderstoodgirl: -_-[20:56] ellisc7458: because u make me whole [20:57] ellisc7458: which means both of us in a way[20:57] ellisc7458: lol[20:57] mizuderstoodgirl: ... [20:57] mizuderstoodgirl: loi[20:57] mizuderstoodgirl: okay you have a point there...a really good one[20:57] ellisc7458: lotdai[20:57] ellisc7458: i know[20:58] mizuderstoodgirl: lotdai[20:58] ellisc7458: laughing on the dark abbysmal inside haha like that comercial[20:58] mizuderstoodgirl: ?[20:58] ellisc7458: jkjk[20:58] mizuderstoodgirl: loi[20:58] mizuderstoodgirl: loi.. funny kine[20:59] mizuderstoodgirl: grr.. hey i have to go...[20:59] ellisc7458: =[[20:59] mizuderstoodgirl: i have to finish mr brewer homework[20:59] mizuderstoodgirl: and your distracting me[20:59] ellisc7458: ugh lol ill have to help you[21:00] ellisc7458: im in ap lolz mr mikinny awsome[21:00] ellisc7458: alright ill let you go[21:00] mizuderstoodgirl: okay...[21:00] mizuderstoodgirl: (tear)[21:00] ellisc7458: i luvs ya babe =][21:00] mizuderstoodgirl: bai[21:00] mizuderstoodgirl: luvs[21:01] ellisc7458: (kisses goodnight)[21:01] mizuderstoodgirl: nite


sorry if it is hard to read. stupid blogger... -_-

let's do the happy dance !!

Let's do the happy dance!

*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*
*dancing*

Yes i am that happy. I bet you can guess why???

The Koreans Strikes Again!!!

Okay before i explain the title, i am going to tell you how my day went. First, i decide that worrying and thinking about the future with YU is a no no. It brings me bad luck. So i went in with a positve attitude. Fourth Period was good. Nothing exciting but nothing boring. After school, things started to get a little interesting.
This morning, I created a plan to get closer to YU I.E Talk to him more, and open up. So i responded to his grand blunt comments. And then Sara came in. She is a korean freshman. And guess how close she is with YU???? So close that she would wear his leathermen. And he wouldn't care. I was beyond Jealous. More than Nina Jealous. I wanted to cry. So to see if they were "together" I ask Lani. Funny Story anyway:
Me: Hey, Lani, can i talk to you outside?
Lani: Sure.
(go outside. And the Ironic part is since we were going to talk about YU he followed us out of the class room)
YU: (talks about how he hates the people who don't do anything)
(me, i am trying to see if there is anymore food left , and i have to jump to see the top shelf)
Yu: what do you need to get?( me and lani look at each other)
Me: uh.. nothing
Yu:.... so you wanted privacy so you can talk about something?
Lani: Yup
(we stare at him)
Yu: so you want me to go???
Lani and me : (nodds head)
Then he leaves. With my experience with Tom and him being nosy, we headed outside to talk
Lani: so what did you want to ask?
Me: What is going on between Yu and Sara??
Lani: IDk, i think she has a asian Boyfriend. But i am not sure.
We head back inside and i feel so confused so i occupied myself with the electrical board.
Yu: So what were you guys talking about that i couldn't hear
Me: (almost blushed) Nothing.
Yu: then why couldn't i hear??
Me: (So i lied real quick) It is not my secret to tell. *( yeah, i did that real smooth)
10 minutes past by (Sara, Lani, and Jessica are in the workroom.)
Lani comes out : Hey marisa. ( then made a hand motion of saying "not together")
I did my inside victory dance.

Another thing that i learn about him that i really wanted to know, how he smells. I mean, Some guys smell really, really, good. Ya know what i mean right?? Well, anyways, Me, Yu, and Miguel were talking about something and i was really close to YU. So i "sniffed" him. Not like, obvious. Very sneaky. and Well, he doesn't wear the heavy cologne stuff. He smells, ... boyish. Like sweat, boyish. It is really hard to describe without giving you the wrong idea. Like Not really good boyish and not EW B.O. boyish. Plus he has been working hard :).
In conclusion, i think my plan worked out really well. Like i have said before, i am not going to be worrying or day dreaming. Just going to let the pieces fall, and hope for the best.


ALSO I DEMAND TWO CERTAIN CHINESE TO STOP BEING STUBBORN AND APOLOGIZE TO EACH OTHER OR I WILL SET EVIL ANNA ON YOU.

we are in love, right?

OMG! Wow sorry if i haven't seen the other blog sooner but the school websites decided to now block blogspot. Those computer blockers are so gay. Anyways. I have news... on the OBD Front. His nickname is YU. Don't ask me why cuz it is beyond "long story" terms.
Anyway, here are the events of the past two days:

Friday:
I came so close into getting into YU's car. He even has a red car. (if you remeber when we were coming back from the hale Koa, we were messing with nina about how Raymonds favorite color is red, and she kept on seeing red cars) He even has it "pimped" out with a stero system in the trunk. I was so mad when i decide to be responsible and not get into the car with him. (i blame you anna). I was so sad and came back into the classroom crying. I mean, he ask me! Me personally! TO GO WITH HIM!! I also cried that night.

Saturday:
The first thing that was said to me when i came into the classroom was, "See! she had the time to get ready this morning" said by YU. All that morning, I think he was trying to get my attention? He was messing with my hair, ( I had it up in braids) and he would dance all funny ( you know, like how i would dance when i am totally bored and being blunt.) everytime he would walk past me. Or he would be like "Rawr" only TO ME!!! And i would just smile and laugh. It went like it all day. Then, like at two, we took a break and YU brought his car up to the basketball court (i have a video on my phone. Not a good one but still, i will post it on youtube) and blare his music. (not screamo,... well maybe some songs). He was wearing a red shirt at the time, so he match his car. I stayed on the side lines, watching him cuz i am not good at soccer.

Overall , he is one point below Mike shinoda. And that is Amazing. He is smart, funny, stupid and caring all rolled up into a blonde head, green eye, guy.

he is with the red car. In the red shirt.

Me and My friends In Q202

Wow remeber all of the good times??? I miss this!! But i do have to say that i miss your long hair nina.OOOh I want a video of you guys!!! pwease!!!!

Saturday Time with the robot

Mood: tired as hell
Stomache status: bk for lunch and mrs. gregory's cookies for dinner :) yum
OBD Alert: Well, hehe... his name isn't pronouce like it is spelled. its: Hey-suest. It's spanish. Any way, he is cool. He has really dark brown eyes that are really creep in a cool way. Also he is a joker and a programmer.

Other than that our cero is having pms issues. I know we should have already complete the electronics but Mrs. Melendez is a bitch. Everything is hook up right but the cero isn't "talking " to the jaguars so the lights are blinking but we don't know what is wrong. It was working before then we updated the software then it just stop coroperating. Any idea's, pictures? HELP!!

2nd Day of FIRST

Hey

Let's startwith the news:
Mr. Melvin and Mr. Wildham have made contact. They will know be emailing each other ( I think) you know, Alliance. Alos, sme of my team members have some praise to Nina and Anna, cause i show them the FIRST Website and they were awe.
Also for some nonimportant news.
first robotics obd.
His name is Jesus (how ironic?) and he is a junior is actually nice. And quite cool.
Anywho...What is up with you guys. I want some update (sophmore and giggles) New , funny things. Anything!!
Love rIsA

Kick Off!

Kick Off video was wow. Joyce.. your driving skills must improve! Mr. Melvin Asked me what i did for the competition:

"So what your role for the competition?"

"I was part of the electrical team and the driving team."

"So you know how to drive the robot?"

"What exactly is your definition of 'drive'?"

"..."

"Me and my friend joyce drove, but that doesn't mean in the straight line. Not even with good tires."

He laughed after that. I am really excited! Are you guys still going to post the cartoons? Cuz i want you too. Even if brynn isn't there. *pouts*

Anywho. I am glad you like your gifts. Nina: you better eat yours or i am calling Mr. Sakayue. I mean it! And the picture of Mr. Sakayue was funny

gay or straight..?? :)

Remember the good old times?

MERRY CHRISTMAS. AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!

Third Edition: The Marisa and Ian show ^^!